This premiership Wednesday, each player’s premiership performance in four measly words:
Gary Ablett Junior: Cat clearance king, again.
Jimmy Bartel: Selfless, critical, tackle record.
Mark Blake: Our King in 2009
Shannon Burns: Rove-esque, man-child, after-byrner
Paul Champan: Gammy hammy, gourmet Norm(ay)
Joel Corey: Most disposals, indisposable midfielder
Corey Enright: Wear the fox hat
Tom Harley: Captain premiership sandwich, legend
Tom Hawkins: Every post a winner
Steve Johnson: Baker denies sausage roll
James Kelly: Collared Goddard, rugged game
Cameron Ling: Mayor, city of dreams
Andrew Mackie: Big game, relentess rebounding
Darren Milburn: Dour, dirty, demonstrative, dasher
Cameron Mooney: Deservedly estatic spiritual leader
Max Rooke: Grand final goal bookends.
Matthew Scarlett: Toe poking genius, rejoice
Joel Selwood: Strength, power, courage, freak
Harry Taylor: Our Leo Harry, massive
Brad Ottens: Most hit outs, invaluable
Travis Varcoe: Did no. 5 proud
David Wojcinski: Turned frown upside down
Here at The Terrace, we were planning a ‘hawkins’ post on Saturday, then Sunday, then Monday, but celebrations got the worse of us. or better of us. Well, you know what we mean! Here goes…
Relief, excitement, vindication, contentment, composure, greatness, toe pokedness, another poster for The Terrace’s toilet wall…ummm, what more can you say? It really was a win for the ages in so many ways, but also a win for the omens.
The premiership day really did roll out like a blue and white carpet from start to finish. From the point we awoke to the sound of rain, to the point we fell asleep dreaming of happy chappy, it was one purffffect day indeed. Here’s how our top 10 omens panned out:
1. I awake to the sound of rain. A good way to warm the omenometer.
2. My blue and white y-fronts fit snug and tight. Omens are all systems gomens.
3. I get a cab to the ground at 3am. The Indian cabbie says i am ‘die hard’ and that we will win. He offers me a half-finished pack of doritos to get me through the 5-hour queue. I decline, but he insists and says they are ‘fresh’. I accept. Nice omen from the Indian gentleman indeed.
4. I meet a girl at the train station on way back to ground. she has standing room tickets and is uber-confident. Nerve-busting omen.
5. I go to The Elm Family Hotel for a meal. Free BBQ – potatoe salad and all. Great omen.
6. The publican’s old man offers us a lift to the ground in his white sedan. Very special and generous omen.
7. We get a hip flask into the reserve. Things are feeling pretty omenesque now.
8. I speak to my missus. She is feeling confident and is pregnant (like ’07). A big (w)omen.
9. I see Gary Ablett Snr as we take our seats. The Terrace: “Gazza”. Gazza: “how’s it goin’, Mate?”. Clearly omen of the day, if not the year. We are home(n).
10. James Morrison playing the trumpet in pre-match hullabaloo. I used to play the trumpet. Luke warm omen, but omen none-the-less. Didn’t really need another omen after the previous omen.
So there you have it. A day of omens that rolled into the much-anticipated seal of greatness. Did you have a special omen? if so, please share it with us by commenting on the post. If warranted we may even create an encyclomenpedia.
Moving on now – as history has it, for the final time in 2009, each magnificent quarter in four words or less:
Q1: I’m nervous, Joel isn’t.
Q2: Three late goals, doh!
Q3: Did i say i’m nervous?
Q4: Toe-poke, ablett, chappy, goal!!!
Q5: Nice poster.
Q6: I want twin-pack dvd.
Q7: Back2Back anyone?
Q8: It feels good.
It would be remiss of us to not share a very special weird stat from the game. Did you know that, Geelong has become the only team to win a grand final by winning the last quarter only? Did you know this is the reverse of the game earlier in the year, where we won every quarter except the first? Weird stat indeed.
Enough words, enough stats, enough omens: how about some sentimental music with moving pictures? Man and women tears permitted.
Forecast for Saturday: Isolated nerves at first, becoming widespread during the afternoon. Local rain, hail and thunderous roars from The Terrace likely, mainly during the afternoon and evening. Shining cup heading west later in the evening.Bureau of Meteorology
The forecast looks good, doesn’t it? But what will the day actually hold? They got it wrong last year. I guess we can only refer to our last encounter. Last time Geelong played St Kilda we made the following observations:
And each of these, gentlemen and ladies, still remains true. So the question is, how nervous are you? Will your level of confidence or modesty have any bearing on the result whatsoever? Will you be wearing your lucky blue and white y-fronts? Will rain and hail be good or bad for our beloved mud cats? Is suicide an option if we lose? Can we wet our pants and cry if we win? Should we have any sympathy or compassion for success-starved Sainters?
For some pre-game reading, enjoy Harmsy’s synopsis of the last time we played. It’s a great read – thanks to ‘lingy4eva’ for the tip off. For some pre-game video, enjoy some uncoventional Gary Ablett Jnr magic (let’s just call it a hat-trick of a different type) and highlights of the last match we played. It was a cracking game, and should be again. Then again, we wouldn’t complain if it was a blow out.
Here at The Terrace, we’re not in the habit of belittling Geelong supporters. After all, Cats supporters make love, not war – especially on grand-final-eve eve. But this one is too good to not share. We’ve watched ‘Ablett: One special season‘ one too many times. About 157 times too many. So we’d like to share with you one of the more humorous momentsfor us – but not for a fellow supporter’s coccyx. It’s taken hours of research to uncover this piece, so please enjoy the fruits of our hard labour. And don’t tell us it hasn’t happened to you!
On another more fluid note, those looking for a post-game venue on Saturday evening, head down to The Gertrude Hotel, 148 Gertrude St, Fitzroy (Cnr Gertrude & Napier Street) from 5.30pm. It’s a short walk from the ‘G, and The Terrace will be there, for better or for worse, with an army of cats fans ready to dribble the night away! We’re getting nervous…
“…it’s a long and proud tradition, of the champions of old, and we know that in the future, you legends will evolve, and the cats are up and running, and screaming out for more. You can hear the pressure rising, you can hear the whole town roar, and the crowd thunders Go Cats!, we break the banner down – we know they’ll play with courage, ’til the final siren sounds. And the rival team will know that…they’ve been run down by a pack – and they been eaten by, beaten by, defeated by, the Cats! It’s the cat attack, go cats, cat attack, Geelong, the cat attack, go cats, the cat attack, Geelong…”
The Cat Attack, 1990s
What better way to wedge Grand-Final week than with some poorly synthesised post-modern b-grade cock rock from the cattery? The Cat Attack not only stirs the inner emotions and get the fists of pride and fury pumping and banging about the room – it also throws us back to the halcyon days of Gary Ablett Snr, bowl cuts and no backline. Good times.
Here at The Terrace, we’re really not sure why they changed the much-loved traditional song. After all, Barry Crocker had a crack in 1982 with “Come on the cats” – and that came a crocker. Pun most definitely intended. So what led them to believe the ’90s would be any different? Was it a commemorative 20th anniversary event – a crap song to commemorate an unsuccessful original? If so, it really was another case of pure commemorative marketing genius (PCMG).
We were going to run with a special Grand Final week red-headed Tuesday, but then Gary won the Brownlow…so we are happy to compromise! Finally the little master, who has borne the weight of expectation from so many for so long, was able to breathe a sigh of relief and smile. Flanked by his lovely missus and the most courageous player in the game, the champagne flowed and the tear ducts opened at The Terrace, as the dream of generational brilliance was again realised in a way few of us could have imagined. Really, it doesn’t get much better than this. Then again, with all due respect to lid maintenance, if he were to sweep a Norm Smith and another Premiership by week’s end, would this make him the most accomplished and greatest footballer at the tender age of 25? That would be special.
He’s won a reserves and a seniors Premiership medal, three AFLPA MVP’s, three AFLCA MVP’s, three All-Australian selections, a Carji Greeves medal and now a Brownlow. Charles Brownlow would be smiling…
By the way, are you praying for rain on Saturday? We are…
Physically, mentally and completely this was a game to savour! From the response to Mick’s impotent words through to the final sweet 17th goal, the GFC displayed WBP (world’s best practise). As the tears rolled down Eddie’s face and Joffa pondered his gold-jacket antics, we relished the moment of indulgence to ponder the possibility. And ponder we will, with The Terrace posting every day this week.
Back to Saturday night…on reflection, the first five minutes of the game seemed incongruous to the overall contest. The Pies looked focused and capable of a prelim repeat of 2007. Ten minutes into the quarter, Gazza and Otto shifted themselves into the middle resulting in clearances, possessions and scoring. The first two goals from Otto and Byrnes were both important, difficult and brilliant. The cats had awoken. Like the signature suplex of Hulk Hogan, the cats applied pressure, showed strength and brought our opponent back to earth with a bone crushing thud.
For the penultimate time, each quarter in four words or less:
1st: Slow start, seagulls annoying
2nd: We can’t shrug them
3rd: Tarkyn’s slow, Byrnes’ goal!
4th: Feel the pressure, Mick?
There was not a weak link in Geelong’s team and so many moments of wonderment. From Scarlo to Boris, Gazza to Johnno, Chappy and the Tommahawk we had winners on every line and every position. We answered every question that was asked. On the contrary Collingwood’s bigger names went missing. Here at The Terrace, we have some questions:
Is Travis Joke an appropriate nickname?
Does the lexus centre recycle tears?
Did you think Davis, Didak and Daisy were d-d-disappointing?
Word from the City of Dreams has it that the players are “Cherry ripe” for Saturday. On a late morning jog at Bells today, celebrating the life of the Bodhi (aka Patrick Swayze in Point Break ), I noticed a local wearing a well-worn GFC cap. I struck up a conversation and he commented that he’d seen the big Otto catching a wave yesterday. Good news indeed, suggesting he is relaxed and back to his Pettigrew-snaring power of 2007. This local also reported some other very interesting news…
He has a mate who has been doing some filming for the GFC. This filmographer does work during the ‘closed sessions’ which have been occurring throughout the year. Apparently the Cats have been working on ‘new’ (and exclusive to the The Terrace) stoppage strategies yet to be used in 2009 – ready for their world premiere this Saturday evening. Whether this local confidant has the goods or not, here at The Terrace are struggling to remain focused on anything but the simmering and bed-wetting excitement inside.
There is no doubt that Bodhi, with his great love of Bells and all things West Coast, was a Cats fan. And in the words of the great man: “Fear causes hesitation, and hesitation will cause your worst fears to come true.” Rest in peace, Patrick, and bring on the Pies!
We could spend our Tuesday talking about Collingwood, and the the drivel their players have been drooling for the past day or so, and the fact that Dane Swan is a first-class bogan, that a high percentage of their team share less-than-below-average excuses for christian names (think dane, dayne, tarkyn, sharrod, jarryd, jarrad, steele) and that they have one player with the surname ‘dick’. But, here at The Terrace we are more mature than that.
