The Terrace

Here at The Terrace, we’ve all had a bumper inaugural year…here’s our top 10 memories from 2009.

1. We discovered that David Mensch is no David Dench – nor a indeed a Mensch.
2. We found a special bound between Anthony Rocca and Whitney Houston.
3. We introduced you to the glorious portrait of John “Olden days’” Scarlett.
4. We left the unwinnable match early – and then we won.
5. We unveiled commemorative marketing genius in its purest form.
6. We found Gary and the sax lounging on the floral couch.
7. We admired the Cameron Ling portrait (aka Ling of Fire).
8. We shared our unique and twisted sense of Coccyx humour.
9. We remembered Bodhi (aka Patrick Swayze) and his special link to the surf coast.
10. We got ROI @ LOI.

Thanking youse for your unwavering love and support throughout the year.

Yours 2010ingly,

The Terrace

The winner really isn’t Sydeney, but it would have been nice to see if Juan Antonio Samaranch got the gist of our rhyming slangfest. Unlikely. Speaking of presidents, did anyone read the article about Edwardo McGuire and the torrent of abuse at the latest Collingwood AGM? Great stuff.

And is it really true that Cameron Cloke is the key to port power’s premiership campaign for 2010? Ho ho.

Anyhow, on a more serious note, Harmsy has been poring over the swag of slangathon entries in an attempt to pick a diamond from what he described as “a superb field”. Some of the better entries were:

Jamie Lamb – (Christmas) Ham
Jimmy Bartel – (Cosy) cartel
James Kelly – (New York) deli
Scratcher Neal – (Potato) Peel
Cameroon Mooney – (Psychotic) Looney
Billy Goggin – (Kid’s) Toboggan
Rod Blake – (Well-done) steak
James McLure – (Salmon) Lure
Dwayne Russell – (Love) Muscle
Andrew Bews – (Geelong) News
Paul Couch – (Money) Pouch
David Mensch – Bench
Joel Corey – (Morning) Glory
Reg Hickey – Sicky
Spiro Malakellis – Well, that’s just too hard.
Matthew Scarlett – (Toe-poke) starlet
Micky Turner – (Slow) learner
Brett Spinks – (Round of) drinks

And the winner is…’Jimmy’ with: “i don’t know about you – but I was a bit Ian Nankervis (nervous) when she was all tied up in the last quarter on Sept 26……”. Great work, Jimmy. It was a tough call and you got extra credit for your fine sentence construct. Your Almanac will be in the post – once you tell us where you live!

For anyone who wants a special Terrace deal on the Almanac (we can’t remember the discount but it was a sweet deal!), contact the Footy Almanac @ footyalmanac@bigpond.com for more details.

Yours christmasfully,

The Terrace

Here at The Terrace, we’ve decided it’s time one of our valued and loyal readers get something back for nothing. Not that anyone pays to read this, but that’s another story. We’re offering you the chance to win the very popular 2009 Footy Almanac. Courtesy of editors John Harms and Paul Daffey, it’s the ideal companion for a mojito on Corio Bay beach during the festive season. You can relive the glory of our Grand Final victory no less than 5 times (there are five reviews of the game).

Don't judge the book by its cover - we all know he is a knob.

Here’s a teaser to get you salivating:

“Saturday. Early arvo. I am having a couple of nerve-settlers in the cricketers Bar at the Windsor. It’s full of Geelong supporters. We farewell a bloke in his motorised wheelchair about to make his way down Spring Street. Cheers. It’s like Albany in 1914. I walk. A Japanese tourist, a beautiful women in her mid-twenties, has unwittingly worn a clinging blue-and-white hooped top. Geelong fans are stopping to have their photo taken with her. She is utterly, uttlery perplexed…”

To WIN, all you need to do is leave a comment at the bottom of this post with some rhyming slang that ties in with Geelong FC (player, place, anything). Here are a couple to get you started:

• Buddha Hocking – Christmas stocking
• Gary Ablett – Panadol tablet
• Max Rook – Rookery nook
• Austin McCrabb – VB slab

The winning slang, judged by Harmsy this Friday (we haven’t asked him but are hoping he’ll do us a favour!), will take home the bacon. Or Footy Almanac. Well, you know what we mean.

Happy slanging,

The Terrace

We couldn’t resist sharing this grand-final photo (click here for a closer look) from one anonymous punter. What a great snap (pun most definitely intended)!

Next week: our very first, very special Terrace Christmas competition/giveaway. How exciting!

Happy Friday,

The Terrace